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| *Vultures Knob>>>Kids Bike |
How to move into my boyfriends house with him and his son and the sons girlfriend.? |
The dad is a pushover, His son is a habitual liar,and the girlfriend is trying to push everyone around. She is only 16. The son is 18. The son works fulltime but does not pay for anything in the house and gets his dad to buy his cigarettes and gas and insurance. The girlfriend gets money sent every month from her dad for food etc but does not buy anything. Execpt for gifts for the boyfriend. But they all seem to have rules and regulations for my daughter. So what am I to do. The dad pays all the bills and the mortgage etc. They pay nothing. Then the son complained the other day because my boyfriend bought my kids a new bike and he didnt get one. Have a family meeting. Are the rules and regs for your daughter formally spelled out, or are they coming up with them as they go along? Playing devil's advocate, they have probably lived "that way" for a long, long time and that you have no right to try and change them. Sorry you think your boyfriend is a pushover, but aren't you going to live with him (seeing as he pays all the bills and mortgage)? What are YOU going to contribute? That doesn't sound like a good situation to move into without setting ground rules (for everyone) beforehand. If it's not all settled before you move in it's not going to get any better when you do. Clarify who's who. Is "The Dad" = your boyfriend? It's really confusingly written. But if that's the case I'd say step up to the plate and be the spine of the household, if it's not appreciated then move on. You'll be doing more damage to your self to stay in such a chaotic house. you respect love and want this man??? he alone is responsible for allowing all of this to happen and you want to move in with all of this? if you go in there and change all the rules the son is going to resent you for it, and so will his girlfriend, you will be the enemy, and whos side do you think his dad is going to take, he obviously isnt a good judge, i'd steer clear if i were you dont move in PLEASE sit down and think -- if the situation is as you described -- Do you really want to move you and your children into the home of this 'boyfriend' who has a disrespectful, out of control son living with an Underage Minor (and believe me -- he, his son can BOTH be charged with not just Statuatory Rape, Sex Crimes (various), as well as interference with Parental Custody (for the girl who is 16), and the SON is definitely an ADULT and abusing his father with his conduct The Father is co-dependent on the Abusive Son and his Criminal Actions (Sex Crimes and interference with Parental Custody), as well as fully supporting this situation (Which most RESPONSIBLE Parents would say "NO WAY WILL I PUT UP With you and an UNDERAGE MINOR GIRL shacking up in MY HOME"). Then ... although you mention that he purchased a bicycle for your kids and seems kind to you ... HERE is the REALITY ... YOU will be the RECIPIENT of ABUSE from the SON and that underage Girl -- they will torment your children and ... This will occur from the time you set foot in the door! PLEASE ... think ... do you really want to expose your own children to such a TOXIC setting for a 'home life' to just go to live with this Boyfriend (the father of the son) at this time? MY own thoughts and advice would be "NO!!!!!!!!" Stay clear and keep your children in a healthy environment, one where they will not see this kind of conflict or disrespect and where you can make sure that they are NOT able to be affected by the toxic behavior at that site at all. PERSONAL Experience with a Toxic EX ... after the divorce happened a decade and half ago ... I have remained SINGLE -- and happily so. MUCH, MUCH Better to be ALONE raising one's children in a stable home than to subject them to being ABUSED in a very toxic situation. |
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