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Is this considered spending time together? |
My husband goes to work at 6:45 am. I see him about 5 mins before leaves. He gets home at 5:45 pm. He then has dinner, watches TV and/or reads a book. Then by 8:30 or 9:00 he is sawing logs on the couch. While he is reading or watching TV he is totally obsorbed in it and most times when I try to talk to him, he doesn't even know I'm talking. Weekends he does his yard work or rides his dirt bike. I say we don't spend enough time together. At least "quality" time together. He says that he is here every night. He considers his reading/watching TV on the couch across the room from me to be "time together". Do you consider it time together to just be in the same room even if you aren't engaged with each other? No it's not. It's up to you to fix this tho. Just arrange something for the two of you to do on the weekend and let him know he has plans for that day and time. Just try to make it something that he'll actually enjoy doing to encourage him to want to do this more often. Inform him that this will occur with some regularity and to expect and accept it. No asking him, no please this or that. Just this is what's happening, be prepared to be there. I've generally found that my husband seems to deal with this approach much better than making some generalized plans to do something at some point. Really they would rather be told what to do and when rather than them actually having to try to figure out for themselves what to do to make you happy. Good luck. No, he needs to wake up and smell the coffee. No there has to be an interaction. i don't but it's up to you. can't you have a couple hrs on the weekend, out of the house to go for a walk, out to dinner, something where you are both not distracted and can talk and laugh. I have the same problem with my boyfriend. I don't consider it spending quality time together, especially if that's the only time your'e spending. Do you try to get him to do other things besides the reading and watching TV? Maybe suggest taking a walk after dinner or doing yard work together. Just a thought, maybe try a new avenue of approach. Have you thought of curling up on the couch next to him? You could enjoy the closeness and make it quality time without denying him his time of relaxation. You could also suggest doing something together every once in a while, like taking a walk or beginning a new hobby together that you could both look forward to. No, that is not quality time at all. It is good that he is there. My husband is often traveling, leaving my alone w/ the kids. Try just being honest with him. Tell him what you'd like for the two of you to do together. I am sure you guys have things in common, and could have a lot of fun together. |
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