Husbands, can you help me understand??

My husband and I are training for a marathon at the end of May 2009 and we are doing a short 6 mile bike/race in November. The running part is only 3 miles.

I suggested we do a 10k at the end of November because there is a fun race early Thanksgiving morning. He got super pissed at me because he said I'm not satisfied with anything, I keep wanting to do more. Why can't we do both? The one in the beginning of November is barely a race, it's super short. I do see why he would get so mad. He doesn't have to run it, I can do it alone, and he can just support me. Shouldn't he be happy that I am trying to be fit and have a healthy lifestyle? Why is he so angry that I want to do a short little 10k 3 1/2 weeks after a super short race?

Husband here:

I'd say either he didn't really want to do the short 6 mile one a lot and may just be doing it for you, or he doesn't consider the 10k a short race. He may feel like he agreed to one thing and now you are pushing for another. When you asked him, it sounds like you suggested 'we', not "I'd like to do this, but you don't have to do it if you don't want to"

My wife and I are happy most of the time and feel we communicate pretty effectively, but there are times when the simplest of phrasing can push the other to being pissed because it wasn't communicated as well as what one of us thought.

It sounds to me like he might be a control freak. I think he wants everything his way and doesn't want you having a mind. I think you need to do exactly what you want to do as long as it is not hurting anyone else. It will make you a much more interesting partner if you have your own life to talk about.

sure he shouldbe but than there comes apoint of thats enough all ready if you want to run then run leave him the hell alone you keeping in shape is great but maybe he doesnt want to run all the time leave him alone and stop hounding him all ready

He may want to spend more time doing some OTHER form of exercises .IF you getthe idea.